This headline is from Karen Steinhauser's amazing presentation to CA parents on January 17.  Karen is an attorney and former Denver District Attorney who specializes in high-conflict family law cases involving sexual abuse allegations and domestic violence.  She spoke about teenagers and safety issues. She covered topics ranging from alcohol and drug use to internet and social media issues.   As an attorney, she has been involved in cases in which the parents have been held liable for their children's behavior, both on the internet and in other settings.  I want to acknowledge and thank parents Jill Moore and Donna Lies, US Parent Association VPs, for helping organize the event.

 

A major thesis of her talk was that the authorities do not treat adolescent behavior the way they used to in the 70s or 80s.  Pranks that were once dismissed by the police now can result in life-changing criminal charges. There are good reasons why this is the case. As a society, we have no tolerance for harassing or bullying behavior.  We do not tolerate drinking and driving.  We don't look the other way in case of sexual harassment or assault.  The stakes are now higher for young people.  Unfortunately, the teenage brain which is not fully formed is still hard-wired in such a way that young people do not think through their actions in rational ways.  Thus, teenagers are prone to making decisions that they know deep down are wrong, even though they are "good kids."  So, what is a parent to do?

 

Karen offered some great insights to how we can help our children navigate the adolescent years.  We need to communicate to our young people the realities of the law and societal expectations regarding internet/social media use, and drugs and alcohol.  But, she also noted how important it is to be stricter in supervision and oversight.  She knows this is a fine line that all parents walk -- we want our children to trust us. But, at the same time, allowing too much freedom can create a situation for a student to get into a lot of trouble.  We are not here to be our children's best friends, and parenting involves setting guidelines and enforcing consequences.

 

I've copied links to her PowerPoint and to a podcast of her talk.  As I noted in my introduction, we do really care about character education at CA, and the school has to build on the values and ethical foundations that families provide to their children at home. Active parent involvement and engagement is key. We had a great crowd of parents at this presentation who posed insightful questions.  It made me proud to be part of the CA community.

PowerPoint Presentation